Have I mentioned that I feel fear every time Tucker punts the ball? I know he’s effective and all, but it just seems like a Charlie Brown kind of thing happening on the field each time he does it.
Anyway. With Black Friday nearing, I thought I would share a list of what some of our favorite College Football folks are hoping for this Christmas:
1. Mack Brown – I'm guessing he's probably hoping to find a quarterback under the tree. I don’t think he cares if it’s new or used, as long as it functions properly.
2. Lane Kiffin – I hear he’s been shopping for a new set of baggage. Oh, I’m sorry. I meant luggage.
3. The Longhorn Network – Still searching for just that perfect major cable provider. Actually, probably any major cable provider will do.
4. Penn State – A time machine…I think I saw one in the Sky Mall catalogue last week. I know they've got the engineering department working on that flux capacitor.
5. Mike Sherman – I’m guessing he’s not wishing for anything new, but just hoping to hold onto a lead he already has.
6. Jim Tressel – I’d imagine Jim’s been scoping out some lessons on email etiquette. A must have for the holiday season.
7. Bob Stoops – On his list, like every year is a new visor. I think he stopped asking for a break even on BCS bowl victories.
8. ESPN – I think they’ve just added a time-delay to their wishlist. Too late? Aw, F@$% it!
9. Art Briles – He’ll be sitting on Santa’s Lap with just one wish…that RGIII sticks it out in Waco for one more year.
10. Rich Rodriguez – I heard he was in the market for a good quality, moisturizing sunscreen.
11. Gary Pinkel – People say they’re impersonal, but gift cards make nice stocking stuffers. Yellow Cab does gift cards, right?
12. Arkansas – A miracle, in the form of a few big upsets. But they’d like their present a little early…like December 3rd.
13. Urban Meyer – For this guy, less is more. He’s hoping that the holidays bring very few Ohio State NCAA sanctions.
14. Gary Patterson – he’s already gotten his wish…entrance into an AQ conference…The Big XII.
15. David Shaw – This Cardinal has made it clear the only thing he wants for Christmas is a playoff system.
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